These past few weeks have been utter chaos. I never realized how much work this move would be until we were in the middle of it! So many moving parts… Moving two jobs and offices, a four year old switching schools, emptying a townhouse and a storage locker. I don’t think we could have done it without our movers. To top it off, Zo already started tee-ball yesterday (Go, Portman Tigers!) and Ben and I have both had to work intermittently/ set up our new offices in downtown Duluth. I’m so happy and relieved to be here. The worst feels like it’s behind us. So much anguish and hard work to get here, and I have to say, it’s been worth it… already! :) Zo told me the other day that she feels like this is her “real” home. She sleeps better, plays outside more, and has already made several friends between the neighbor girls and her tee-ball team.
We’re home. Truly, home. And it feels wonderful.
Ben came up with that logo and drew it on the driveway! Color me extremely impressed. Zo had started out wanting another Toothless birthday party but changed her mind to Baymax and Big Hero 6 a little over a month before her party.
I thought that’d be easy enough since everything is just a white circle with two black circles that are connected by a black line! It was probably the easiest party we’ve done, and the cake took a lot less time than the Toothless cake did last year!
The weather took a turn for the worst as the last guests were getting into their cars. Torrential rain followed and we hung around inside finally going through Zo’s long anticipated goodie bag!
Thanks to everyone who made Zo’s day so special! She had a blast! And special super thanks to Auntie Kari for making Zo her incredible Baymax pinata. Zo can’t wait to put it in her new room! She would have been devastated if we had to bash him for candy!
Seems weird to be counting months at this point, but it’s so fun to go back through the monthly pictures that I don’t intend to stop!
Last week, my beautiful girl turned four. We quickly shot these pictures before going to Mall of America for rides and dinner “at a place where they will sing”. Requests of the birthday girl. Disappointed to find out they’re changing up or repairing her favorite rides. Looks like Swiper Sweeper is no more! Color Zo devastated. Good thing we still had the carousel and Diego’s Bus.
It’s crazy how fast the time has gone. And yet, I can’t really remember life before my girl. Time, slow down!
Zo was thrilled when she was brought up on stage at the Hard Rock so the whole restaurant could sing her Happy Birthday! She ate it up. We didn’t get any pictures since we videoed it, but we did get these gems!
I promise we didn’t tell her to do that with her eyes! Can’t stop laughing every time I see those pictures! And then we headed home for some presents and cake! Daddy gave Zoey a gold and emerald necklace in honor of her golden birthday. Her reaction was precious. She thanked Daddy very sincerely and told him she’d “wear it always.” Ugh. Melt.
And, of course, more cake! Mommy and Zoey got carried away and had an actual cake fight. We couldn’t stop laughing! Was fun to get crazy… It started out small, but by the end Zo was COVERED!
As much as I loved breakfast in bed, the flowers, the coffee mug, and the handmade poster at the bottom of the stairs, it was the gift Zo gave me last night that was the summation of why it’s a gift to be a Mom…
After we read books, as I was tucking her in, she grabbed my hand, kissed my palm, closed my fingers into a fist and pushed my fist to my chest. She said “Here, Mommy. That’s for later, in case you need me.”
Nothing further needs to be said. My little love. The reason I breathe. So grateful to be her mother.
Zo’s lucky. Her birthday happens to fall on a very cool, unofficial holiday. Let me start by saying, May the fourth be with you! Not only is today Star Wars Day, it’s the day that our beautiful Zeejian Weegian came into this world! I can’t believe how tiny she was. Now, she’s over half my height. Where does the time go?!
Don’t worry, we don’t feed her Blazin’ wings. She had her “favorite Buffalo Wild Wings macaroni and cheese”, as she tells our waitress. And the best early birthday gift was outside the restaurant waiting for her…
Her party was awesome yesterday! She felt so special and so loved. I’ll do a bigger post about the party later this week but here is one of my favorite pictures from the day… thanks for taking it, Jill!
This is the first birthday that Zo has spent at school. While it makes me a little sad to not be with her, she was so excited to spend it with her friends in class! Grateful that Zo’s teachers sent us these pictures today!
I love this kid. Everything about her. You know that, though. Ugh. Like Ben always says, her birthdays are always a little sad. It’s so hard to say goodbye to the age she’s at because she’s so wonderful, but each year does get better and that helps us feel at peace with the fact that she’s growing up. So. Fast.
Between moving, party prep, work, and everything else, I have really cut it close with all the things I should be doing right now! Just finished up Zo’s birthday video last night. I can’t believe she’s going to be 4 on Monday. Her golden birthday! I can’t even put into words how highly I think of this kid. The love and pride are overwhelming. The song I chose for the video this year describes her perfectly (not to mention that it’s her favorite song right now). It’s from How to Train Your Dragon 2. It’s about celebrating your individuality; doing what others wouldn’t do. That’s so her. She’s unlike any kid I’ve met. Her compassionate nature and good heart slay me. She doesn’t care that she’s not like other girls. She loves dragons and dirt. She loves every creature. She’ll pick up earthworms and beetles and name them and make up wonderful stories about their lives. And, a day later, she can go to a photo shoot, sit in hair and makeup, and take gorgeous pictures without batting an eyelash. She dose this all with humility and character. She truly goes where no one goes, as the song says, and makes no apologies for her preferences. I could learn a lot from her.
Here’s her video! (Music credit: Jonsi – Go Where No One Goes) If you click on the 360p in the lower right hand corner of the video box and switch it to “720p HD” the resolution will be better. You can also make the video full screen by clicking the rectangle in the lower right hand corner of the video box.
To my darling girl:
Continue to be you. Never let anyone make you feel like you’re wrong because you do your own thing. It’s undeniable that your outer beauty is staggering, yet, it’s your inner beauty that draws everyone to you. You truly have the kindest heart. The other day, when I was sad, you took my hand and told me you’d make it better. You protect those that you love. Those things cannot be taught. That light is born in you. You have a fearless heart that feels empathy and compassion for every person. You can talk to the veteran on the light rail or the teenage boy working the checkout at Target. They want to talk to you because you take a true interest in them and make them feel like they matter, because it’s so clear to you that they do matter. I’ve seen you change a person’s day with your smile and that bubbly “Hello! I’m Zoey!”. This is such a gift. Don’t ever let anyone change that about you, for it’s your inner beauty that makes you the person that I love.
You are one of a kind. No one is like you. For that, I’m so grateful, because there is no greater gift than being an individual… and a sincere one at that. You don’t do it to be quirky. You don’t do it to appease others. You do it because it’s who you are. When I tell you many times a day how much I love you, it’s because I can’t hold it in. Every time I look at you, I beam because I’m lucky enough to have you in my life. When we play the “I love you more than” game, the background noise disappears. That is what I live for. Thank you for being the greatest gift in my life. It’s truly difficult to explain how much I love you and how proud I am of you. You can change the world. Truly. That smile, that light in your eyes, and that positive, loving person you are. It will move mountains. Slow for no one, Zoey! Continue to go where no one goes!
Happy Golden 4th Birthday, my Zeejian Wegian! May 4th is truly a day to celebrate!
The cat’s slowly creeping out of the bag. So much change in such a short amount of time. I’m sorry that some of you are finding out this way. It wasn’t something we publicized greatly once we really started to implement the final stages of our plan in late March. I’m still nervous about sharing it since we haven’t officially closed on our house yet (passed inspection and set to close in late June), but yes, it’s happening! We are FINALLY moving to Duluth! And I’m so excited about how well it’s worked out so far that it is hard to keep to myself!
So… the obvious part… You all knew we wanted this. It’s been anything but a secret. No short term goal but something we’ve seemingly dragged out for almost a decade. And the things that had to happen to get us to this point have certainly been stressful. We’ve experienced ridiculous highs and scary lows. Obnoxiously long story short, we accomplished this because we didn’t give up. Everything fell into place because we worked so hard to do it right and time everything perfectly. I still have trouble believing how easily this all went down which is why I’m so nervous it’s going to cave in at any moment. To finally see all this begin to culminate… it’s almost unbelievable. I still have trouble wrapping my head around the fact that it’s actually happening. I think it’ll become more real when we sit down on our first night in our house. Zo will be sleeping peacefully in her brand new, pink, gray and dragon themed bedroom (by request). We will be surrounded by boxes. I will be half way through my glass of one of the hundreds of delicious Duluth craft beers that I used to have to drive 2.5 hours to get. I will most likely break down and cry. I just can’t believe it. I can’t even fathom how this is going to feel. A home. Finally. Someone pinch me.
I had written a much longer post (it’s already long-winded, I know!) about why we’ve been so removed from everything, but I realized that it shouldn’t matter. And it doesn’t matter. All I can say is that we did what we needed to do to guard our goal from destruction. From distractions. We were so afraid to share what was going on because we were so afraid it wouldn’t happen. We’ve accomplished what we once thought impossible and I can tell you that there were many nights when we felt like we just couldn’t keep going. We’d sit on the couch feeling that malaise. Should we just buy a house down here? Keep Zo in her school? But we always came back to the same conclusion. We wouldn’t be happy. The appeal of a new, flashy Prior Lake or Stillwater house would wear off in a few months and we’d just end up saying to ourselves, “I wish we lived in Duluth.” Restless, again. All the sacrifices we’ve made would have been for nothing.
In a nutshell, our plan went perfectly. We are able to transfer our positions to our Duluth office and we were so fortunate to have an offer accepted on a house in our desired neighborhood with a view of the lake. An impressive view, at that. The interior is beautiful and I can’t wait to fix up the outside! We were the first ones to see it and the first (of TEN) to offer. Who knew the Duluth housing market would get so competitive? The sellers are transferring to the Twin Cities for work at the exact same time we need to move out of our townhouse so that couldn’t have worked out better. Zo will be assigned to the grade school we desperately wanted her to go to.
So, why do I feel so scared when it is all going so well?! Change is difficult; this is true. But this is the change we’ve been working so hard for. Perhaps, it’s that we will have accomplished that goal that we’ve spent the majority of our adult lives trying to achieve. What’s next? Should that be something I worry about? I truly think that the beauty is, I can finally relax and take the time to exist. No breadcrumb trail of consequences that could effect the outcome of our goal. Just happy, windy, northern-cold existence. I will have to relearn everything: a commute-free schedule, a route to school, where to grocery shop, where to take Spliff to the vet, and mostly, just how to live without unyielding stress. With this lack of stress… oooooh… I can’t even imagine the sleep I’m going to get! Until then, we haven’t closed on the house so that is still our hanging chad. I think I will have one ore two more sleepless nights. I won’t feel like this is real until I have a house key in my hand. I honestly couldn’t have done any of this without Ben. He works so hard for our family and I would’ve given up on this craziness a long time ago if it hadn’t been for his persistent pep talks and positive attitude. Ben tends to go unappreciated. I want to put it out there, because it doesn’t get said enough… He’s amazing. He is the reason we succeed. He’s the rational voice in a crowd of crazy. Love him.
I hope that the next time I do a house update, it’ll be because we’ve successfully closed and moved in! Wish us luck! Thank you to everyone who had a hand in our success with all this. It was so difficult and we are truly grateful for the love and support we’ve received!